Author: an absurd monk

… all voices sound different in solitude!

distance and love

Daily writing prompt
What makes a good neighbor?
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Distance! In a physical sense. Love in a spiritual.

I have no neighbours at the moment. One side is the church, and the other is a car park. There is lots of space!

But how am I a good neighbour to those in my life? I make choices that benefit them (or perhaps for their good). And I do that without asking or looking for anything in return. The starting point is not “the good” (an ideal I created) but the good in the other. I have a duty to love, and that duty is to the person, not to an idea. I try to live that with the people in my life. It is not easy and, at the moment, almost impossible.

moving forward

Daily writing prompt
What’s the biggest risk you’d like to take — but haven’t been able to?
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I have reflected on the ” risk ” question in the last week or so. I feel stuck at the moment. Knowing where to go from here is easy; actually, doing it is different. The risk is in the doing, and, to be honest, I am not in an emotional state to take risks.

So I am stuck, down on myself, irritable, and argumentative (it is better to stay in solitude). I am struggling with prayer. All my hope is in the medication I am on, but that has not worked as well as at other times. I am having really strange vivid dreams.

The biggest risk is doing the thing that will unstuck me. But there are no magical solutions and maybe I am simply the problem.

wait on God alone in stillness

Refrain:    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul.

1    On God alone my soul in stillness waits;  ♦
from him comes my salvation.
2    He alone is my rock and my salvation,  ♦
my stronghold, so that I shall never be shaken.
3    How long will all of you assail me to destroy me,  ♦
as you would a tottering wall or a leaning fence?
4    They plot only to thrust me down from my place of honour;
lies are their chief delight;  ♦
they bless with their mouth, but in their heart they curse.
5    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul;  ♦
for in him is my hope.
6    He alone is my rock and my salvation,  ♦
my stronghold, so that I shall not be shaken. [R]
7    In God is my strength and my glory;  ♦
God is my strong rock; in him is my refuge.
8    Put your trust in him always, my people;  ♦
pour out your hearts before him, for God is our refuge.
9    The peoples are but a breath,
the whole human race a deceit;  ♦
on the scales they are altogether lighter than air.
10  Put no trust in oppression; in robbery take no empty pride;  ♦
though wealth increase, set not your heart upon it.
11  God spoke once, and twice have I heard the same,  ♦
that power belongs to God.
12  Steadfast love belongs to you, O Lord,  ♦
for you repay everyone according to their deeds.

Refrain:    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul.

Common Worship, Psalm 62

the decision

In baptism, God calls us out of darkness into his marvellous light.
To follow Christ means dying to sin and rising to new life with him.

Therefore I ask:
Do you reject the devil and all rebellion against God?
I reject them.

Do you renounce the deceit and corruption of evil?
I renounce them.

Do you repent of the sins that separate us from God and neighbour?
I repent of them.

Do you turn to Christ as Saviour?
I turn to Christ.

Do you submit to Christ as Lord?
I submit to Christ.

Do you come to Christ, the way, the truth and the life?
I come to Christ.

Common Worship – Baptism

detached?

The difference remains, however, and is between being, or at least striving to be, what one admires—and being personally detached. Let us now completely forget this danger connected with confessing Christ and think rather of the danger of actuality that is inescapably bound up with being Christian. Does not Christian teaching about ethics and obligation, Christianity’s requirement to die to the world, to surrender the earthly, its requirement of self-denial, does this not contain enough requirements—if they were to be obeyed—to produce the danger of actuality that makes manifest the difference between an admirer and an imitator, makes it manifest precisely in this way, that the imitator has his life in these dangers and the admirer personally remains detached although they both are nevertheless united in acknowledging in words the truth of Christianity? Thus the difference still remains. The admirer will make no sacrifices, renounce nothing, give up nothing earthly, will not transform his life, will not be what is admired, will not let his life express it—but in words, phrases, assurances he is inexhaustible about how highly he prizes Christianity.

Practice in Christianity

waiting

Daily writing prompt
What was the hardest personal goal you’ve set for yourself?
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I am not sure if it is a “goal” or simply a way of living. The book of Psalms says, “Wait in hope for the Lord.” That is my goal – to wait. I desire closer communion with Jesus. Yet, there is nothing I can do to merit such a gift – absolutely nothing. So I wait in hope. In other words, “for God all things are possible.” I desire the possibility of God.

It seems paradoxical that I do nothing (in hope) to achieve the goal I desire. Maybe one day!

writers?

Daily writing prompt
Who are your favorite artists?
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I have a whole collection of favourite writers. And they change. At the moment, I am happy with anything by or about Soren Kierkegaard. A love affair that has been going on for some time. I find new things in his writing. Rabbit-holes!

Who else? Nietzsche at the moment, but I have had a major crush on Kafka. Reading The Metamorphosis (Verwandlung) was a major event.

I like journals or diaries. Kierkegaard or Kafka are good examples. Thomas Merton’s 7-volume set is good but, to be honest, can be a little on the pompous side. There was a time when I swallowed Merton’s books whole.

I have been on a little existentialist journey in theology, especially with John Macquarie.

Did I forget anyone? Most certainly.